Was It Really A Blessing?
by BadgerInMySoup
Summary: My own interpertation of a missing scene from 'Guerilla Filmmaking.


AN- Missing scene from Gurilla Filmmaking.

Flashbacks in italics.

* * *

Joey walks down the street thinking to herself. Her conversation with Dawson has her wondering, yet again, why they didn't work out.

Sighing, her head down, she counts the cracks in the sidewalk. She looks up, something catching her eye.

Pacey and Audrey were in a tight embrace, kissing each other passionatly.

Joey sighs to herself, a small smile forming on her face, happy her friends found each other.

As she wactches them, a wistful look comes to her eyes.

* * *

_''Alright what did you mean by that?'' Pacey asked her, walking in front of his car._

_''By what?'' Joey asked, walking over to him._

_''About me knowing you better then anyone else.'' Pacey said._

_''Exactly what I said Pacey. You know me better then anyone else, besides Dawson, ever has.'' Joey tells him._

_''We're not talking about Dawson ok. We're talking about me. You can't keep doing this to me Potter!'' he shouted, fed up with his charade,_

_''Doing what? So I count on you and tell you secrets and, ''_

_''And call me in the middle of the night to pick you up, why?'' he asked._

_''I'm sorry that I called you Pacey I just thought, ''_

_''I'm not mad that you called me. I just wanna know why you called me.'' he said nervously, his heart beating fast._

_After a long pause, she answers._

_''You were the first person that I thought of Pacey.'' she told him._

_''But what does that mean Jo?'' he asked._

_''I...I guess it means that I can talk to you and that you're there for me.'' she said._

_''Don't you ever get tired of talking?'' Pacey asked, a little chuckle in his voice._

_''No.'' she said, confusedly._

_''Well I get tired of talking. I don't wanna talk anymore.'' he said, nervously._

_''What do you mean Pacey. Why are we standing here. Why, ''_

_Suddenly, his hands framed her face, his lips pressed gently against hers._

* * *

_''Look I felt it.'' Joey said to Pacey's retreating form._

_He stops and turns toward her, a look of confusion on his face._

_''What?'' he asked, impatiently._

_''This morning. You are brushed up against me in bed and...I felt it.'' she said._

_''How did it feel?'' he asked quietly._

_''Made me feel alive.'' Joey said._

_''Ok, Joey. I'm going to kiss you now.'' Pacey said, clasping his hands together and walking towards her._

_''You can't'' she said, hurridly._

_He holds up a hand to stop her._

_''Jo, you can't me something like and expect me not to kiss you. So that's exactly what I'm going to do. I'm gonna kiss you, in about ten seconds and if you dont want me to, well if you don't me to, you're just gonna have to stop me.'' he said, walking closer to her._

_He stops in front of her and cups her face with his hands._

_''Ten'' he whispered, his lips desending upon hers._

* * *

_''If you felt even one shred of what I feel for you, then we wouldn't be standing here having this conversation.'' Pacey tells her, walking past her._

_''Pacey.'' she whispered, grabbing his hand and stopping him._

_She turns toward him and leans up to kiss him. As the kiss deepens, her hands fly to cup his face. His hands travel to her back._

* * *

_''I think I'm in love with you.'' Joey said to Pacey's back._

_''You think or you know?'' he asked, his back still turned._

_Taking a deep breath she utters the words he's always needed and wanted to hear,_

_''I know.''_

_He turns to look at her, a small smile on his face. She continues._

_''I've known it the moment you kissed me and maybe even before that and as scary as it is, I don't want to run from it and I don't want it to run from me.'' she told him._

_Smiling broadly now, Pacey stands up._

_''So what are we gonna do here?'' he asked._

_''I wanna come with you.'' she said._

_''What? Are you crazy?'' he asked her._

_''Nope, I wanna stop standing still. I wanna move forward. I wanna come with you.'' Joey said._

_''What about Bessie and the B&B they need you.'' he told her._

_Meeting his eyes, she says,_

_''Not as much as I need you Pacey.''_

_He lets out a chuckle and Joey strarts to step on board._

_''Ah, ah, ah.'' he said, wagging a finger at her._

_''Permission to come aboard?'' she asked, holding out her hand._

_''Permission granted.'' he replies, pulling her on board._

_They kiss passionstly._

* * *

_''I wanna throw the wrapper away.'' she whispered to him._

_''Jo, if this is about, ''_

_''Pacey, this is about how you carried my bag off the bus this morning. This is about how, when we go to the movies, you go and buy popcorn, you always bring back a napkin so I don't wipe the grease on my jeans. This is about, just last week at miniture golf, you went first so I would know all the correct paths.''_

_Taking a pause, she begins to unbutton his shirt._

_''You taught me how to drive. Yuo knew the bracelet that I wore at prom was my mom's. You kissed me first, sweetheart, and the second time, you counted to ten before doing it again, just in case I wanted to stop you.''_

_She slips the shirt of his shoulders and takes his hand, kissing it gently._

_''You bought me a wall.''_

_''I didnt' buy so much as I,''_

_She interupts him, taking of his undershirt._

_''We were alone on that boat for three months and you understood, without a word, why I wasn't ready. Do you really have to ask me now, why I am? So, I'm gonna count to ten and then I'm gonna kiss you and if you don't want me to then you're just gonna have to stop me.''_

_She leans up and whispers against his mouth,_

_''Ten, my love.''_

_They begin to kiss, his hand gripping the back of her head, her hands moving slowly up his back. He kisses her neck, then her shoulder. He picks her up and she gasps quietly. He brings her backward, to the bed._

* * *

_''So what I'm saying is...if I were lucky enough to find myself owning a sailboat and I wanted the woman I loved to come with me...would she?'' Pacey asked._

_''You wouldn't have to ask.'' Joey tells him, quietly._

* * *

Joey wipes away a single tear as it makes its way down her cheek.

She was happy that Pacey and Audrey found each other, really she was.

But a part of her was screaming ''No! Don't do it! You love him!''

Joey ignored that part as she watched Pacey and Audrey walk to his car.

Her constant conflict between her head and her heart was at it again.

This time her head won.

Her heart would have to deal with her blessing.

For now.

* * *

AN- So what did u think? Let me know!


End file.
